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"I think a good novel would be where a bunch of men on a ship are looking for a whale. They look and look, but you know what? They never find him. And you know why they never find him? It doesn't say. The book leaves it up to you, the reader, to decide. Then, at the very end, there's a page you can lick and it tastes like Kool-Aid."

—Jack Handey [Deep Thoughts], Recurring Saturday Night Live comedy bit


World News From BBC

Islamic State 'kills US hostage' 
  Tue, 02 Sep 2014 22:36:16 GMT 
    An Islamic State video purporting to show the beheading of Steven Sotloff, a US journalist abducted by the group, is released.

Million 'have fled Ukraine conflict' 
  Tue, 02 Sep 2014 16:35:02 GMT 
    The number of people who have fled the fighting in Ukraine has doubled in weeks, and the UN says more than a million have now been displaced.

Celebrity leaks 'no breach' - Apple 
  Tue, 02 Sep 2014 19:49:12 GMT 
    The leaking of intimate photos of celebrities from iCloud accounts was due to a theft of log-in information, not a security breach, says Apple.

Ashya's parents freed from prison 
  Tue, 02 Sep 2014 20:54:01 GMT 
    The parents of Ashya King are released from prison in Spain after UK prosecutors withdrew a European arrest warrant.

DNA overturns 30-year US convictions 
  Tue, 02 Sep 2014 22:56:35 GMT 
    Two US men who spent three decades in prison for rape and murder, one on death row, are released after new DNA evidence proves their innocence.

Ebola response 'lethally inadequate' 
  Tue, 02 Sep 2014 15:52:29 GMT 
    A global military intervention is needed to curb the largest ever Ebola outbreak, according to the medical charity Medecins Sans Frontieres.

US targets al-Shabab's leader 
  Tue, 02 Sep 2014 19:44:15 GMT 
    The US military says it has carried out air strikes in Somalia, targeting the leader of militant group al-Shabab, but it is unclear if he was killed.

Arrests over Afghan child marriage 
  Tue, 02 Sep 2014 10:51:00 GMT 
    The parents of an eight-year-old girl and a 12-year-old boy are arrested on charges of arranging their under-age marriage in northern Afghanistan.

Gayet wins new French privacy case 
  Tue, 02 Sep 2014 16:32:02 GMT 
    Actress Julie Gayet, linked to President Hollande, wins a privacy case against a photographer who snapped her in her car, which French law deems private space.

Mass escape from juvenile US prison 
  Tue, 02 Sep 2014 18:35:15 GMT 
    More than 30 teenagers held at a juvenile detention centre in Tennessee escape by crawling through a fence and nine are still being sought.

Cockatoos teach tool-making tricks 
  Tue, 02 Sep 2014 23:19:28 GMT 
    Cockatoos learn to make and use tools when shown by another bird, research reveals.

Chris Brown pleads guilty over punch 
  Tue, 02 Sep 2014 14:29:16 GMT 
    Rapper Chris Brown admits punching a man in October last year but walks free from court because of time already served.

VIDEO: Apple: Celebrity accounts hacked 
  Tue, 02 Sep 2014 21:58:14 GMT 
    The FBI are investigating allegations that the online accounts of dozens of celebrities have been hacked, allowing explicit photos to be posted on the internet.

VIDEO: Uganda's Ghetto Kids: 'Dance changed my life' 
  Tue, 02 Sep 2014 07:03:04 GMT 
    Children in Uganda working in a pioneering dance group, Ghetto Kids, have been describing how it has changed their lives for the better.

VIDEO: Beauty queen refuses to return crown 
  Tue, 02 Sep 2014 14:13:28 GMT 
    Myanmar's first ever beauty queen has refused to give back her $100,000 (£60,300) crown after being dethroned.
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